decisions

I do not think I am any good example in making thought through and responsible decisions.

However, who decided what decisions are good or bad?

And what it really means "responsible decisions"?

Well whenever I want to find out about something, I jump straight into it. It is not like I am not afraid. I am, I am panicking like anyone else or maybe even more than others because I know myself and I know I am going to try it, I am going to do it. My curiosity won't let me just leave it.

As anyone I get enthusiastic about million things, why I choose one of them above the other is hard to say, but I do not fear difficulties that come with any change.

Being ready for difficulties it is not enough, the most frightening is that I have to decide on one particular path. Choosing one means missing out on others, or does it?

Obviously I am afraid of choices I make now, I do not want to regret anything when I am older. One thing I am really afraid of is that I will be grumpy and frustrated... That is a huge pressure.

But following all the possible paths means you follow none.

So what I try to do is to take risks, follow some paths and abandon others. Sometimes I am following certain path just to prove that it wasn't the right one. Sometimes I even know it won't be my path, but still I try it just to be sure, just to not regret I haven't check it out. It might seem chaotic to some people but I try to think 'who cares'.

No one can make choice without feeling afraid. Even not making any decision because of lack of courage is a decision.

I believe that our brain is very powerful machine and it can analyze way more than we aware of, so I just listen to my subconscious part of brain, an "intuition". For some of you it might be following your heart, or listening to your soul, or to God, no mater how you call that wisdom voice I would recommend listening to it. I just think it is easy to over think stuff, so sometimes is better to just be spontaneous, or just sleep on it and see what seem right in the morning.

About big decisions well as long as you know what you want, and you aim to achieve it then eventually you will see that whole world bends, flexes, and curves to make a crazy path to get to your dream.

Decisions are even harder if you have to take another person into equation, well it is harder if you respect that person's freedom. But this one is a whole different topic called love.

As I said I am not the best in decision making, but I think I do what I can to cross out from equation things that I do not want to do. And I think the times when it went wrong taught me something, because nothing is ever completely wrong.

I was inspired to write this post by the book I am still reading "Brida", I am terribly slow reader, and of course by a big danish chocolate pound cake (very fatty, a bit salty and very very chocolate'ish). 

A good cake is a necessity whenever you have to be a bit philosophical.